Rebirth Of A Noble Daughter: Chapter 4

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Chapter 4: Death

“A Ning, don’t be afraid,” Lou Xue Fei still said, “Daddy will come and find us, A Ning. Brother and sister will also love A Ning. A Ning must be a good child and listen to father, okay?”

Shen Qing Ci touched Lou Xue Fei’s cold cheeks, she sat up and placed Lou Feixue’s thin, dry hands on her face.“En…”

She nodded vigorously, “Mother, A Ning is not afraid. A Ning will listen to her father and will like her brother and sister. A Ning will remember her mother forever, and A Ning will remember every word her mother said. Every word.”

Lou Xue Fei’s hands trembled, gently rubbing her daughter’s small face.“That’s right,” she laughed. The smile was a little dazed, but it was also comforting. Her Ning seemed to have grown up, as if she could walk with peace of mind, she could even smile at the underworld.

“A Ning, listen to mother…” She coughed, and then insisted on trying to finish the last words to her daughter. She really felt that she was going to die. If she didn’t say it, she would never be able to say it out.

“A Ning, mother put something in the clothes of the Bodhisattva at home, A Ning, remember to get it…” Her eyelashes fell, and some light was shaken out. The daughter’s face was clear, only her daughter’s little hands holding her were still warm, and the faint fragrance on her body, just like in the spring season, the vitality that never fades is what gives her the energy now.

“A Ning don’t be afraid.”She kept repeating these words, even when she was dying, she couldn’t let go of her young daughter.

“Mother, A Ning is not afraid.” Shen Qing Ci shrank her small body into Lou Xue Fei’s arms. Lou Xue Fei slowly lowered her hands, and then placed them on her daughter’s face, while Shen Qing Ci moved. She hadn’t moved for half a minute, but she was sad to find that her mother’s hand was getting colder and colder. She took Lou Xue Fei’s hand and kept her warm from time to time.

“Mother, it’s not cold. A Ning will blow mother’s hands, and mother will not be cold anymore.” She was blowing heat from time to time, but Lou Xue Fei’s hand was getting colder and colder.Her mother’s hands won’t be warm again, mother’s eyes won’t open again, mother will not say, “A Ning don’t be afraid” anymore… In this world, if there was someone who holds her in the palm of her hand like a treasure, it’s only her mother, her mother…

“Mother, mother…”

Shen Qing Ci cried out from time to time, as if she wanted her to wake up, but she also knew that she can’t hear her anymore.Shen Qing Ci kept her small body in Lou Xue Fei’s arms again, because she was her mother, she was not afraid. She was not afraid at all, she just wanted to let her hug her, she would have no mother in the future, and she could no longer call her mother.

She closed her eyes and said something softly in her mouth, as if she was chanting Buddhist scriptures, word by word, sentence by sentence…

“Rid of all sins and reborn in a good land…”^[1]

She choked, and her voice was almost dumb. But before she stopped, she chanted the death mantra for her mother, she will perform religious ceremonies to help her mother’s soul find peace, and she would send her mother on the road to Heaven.She was alive, but her mother died.She sat up again, and took her mother’s cold hand and placed it on her little face.

Mother, A Ning is not afraid, A Ning is not afraid at all.

A Ning will send you off.

She carefully took Lou Xue Fei’s hand and placed it in front of her, and then wiped away the tears from her face with her little hand. But she found that the handkerchief on the other side was stained with blood.

In fact, Shen Qing Ci knew that her mother should have left a long time ago. The doctor said that she would have died earlier and her suffering could be less, but her mother was not willing. She has been holding her last breath. She was waiting for someone, but in the end, she still hasn’t waited for that person to arrive, and she was also reluctant to leave her young daughter. She wanted to look at her daughter more. She still had a lot to say to her daughter, and there were many things she wanted to let her know.Shen Qing Ci took the kerchief, then climbed onto the simple wooden shelf, and then pulled over the broken quilt made of cotton and covered Lou Xue Fei’s body, and then she knelt down and knocked her head three times heavily before she ran out.

There was no one near this side of the village, only a dilapidated house, which was her home and there was a small bowl at the door with half a bowl of rice in it. Shen Qing Ci glanced at the bowl of rice and ran out.She hurriedly knocked on the door of a farmer until the door opened.She knelt at the door and then slammed her head to the ground. This was the family that was good to her in her previous life. After her mother died, they had been taking care of her who was still young, and they helped to bury her mother.  But when they passed by her house, her mother’s body was already stinking, because no one knew that Lou Xue Fei was dead.

At that time, she was still young, and she only knew that much. She thought her mother was asleep and never awoke. It was not until later that she knew that it was impossible for her mother to wake up again in her life.

She raised her face and saw a capable woman in her forties walking out of it, and she was shocked when she saw Shen Qing Ci.

Isn’t this Xiao Qing Ci^[2] from Madam Shen’s^[3] family? What’s wrong? Why is she kneeling?

She hurriedly wanted to help up Shen Qing Ci, but Shen Qing Ci slammed her head to the ground with a bang. It almost shattered people’s hearts.

“Aunty, A Ning’s mother is asleep, and she won’t wake up. Aunty, help A Ning. A Ning begs Aunty to help A Ning.” She said as she kept kowtowing.

Everyone in the village was evasive as if the mother and daughter were snakes and beasts.

Lou Xue Fei was ill and her illness could not be cured for a long time. It was said that her illness would be contagious, so everyone in the village was afraid that the disease would be transmitted to them, so they let the mother and daughter live in the furthest and most dilapidated house in the village. Even for the food they ate, Lou Xue Fei used their belongings in exchange for them. They sent the food to the door and left straight away. They were afraid of taking one more step. All of them were disgusted.

And now she can only ask for help from this family, and the others would not open the door to her at all. She tried it in her last life, and she was dying. When she was eating stones on the ground, she knocked on other people’s doors. Even if a person opened the door to her, no one would give her even a bite of food. She was beaten and scolded by others. She hid alone and cried for her mother. She was hungry and cried at her mother’s tombstone. Later, the farmer’s wife couldn’t bear to see her like that, and brought her home, gave her food, water, and a place to sleep.

Until Dad came, Dad came to pick her up, and she followed Dad, but she forgot to pay her back for that…She wanted her mother to rest in peace, she wanted to live, she wanted Huang An Dong and Lou Zi Yin to live a tragic life so that they think death is better than living. She must protect her loved ones and everyone around her who died tragically in her past life.

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Notes:

[1] 往生咒  : Death mantra is chanted when a person dies, whishing for them to be free of all karma, to pass in peace and they could be born again in a good family and have a good life.

[2] “Xiao” means “Little”. It is also a form of endearment.

[3] Usually, Maiden surname is attached with ‘Madam’; and husband’s surname is attached with ‘Furen’ here it should be actually ‘Madam Lou’ or ‘Shen Furen’. But since the villagers don’t know Lou Xue Fei’s maiden name, they call her as such.

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 T/Talks: The Character List is available… It will be updated periodically… And beware of spoilers…

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